Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online

Team Leader Clearance:
Number of Service Services:
Secret Society Missions
Anti-Mutant
Computer Phreak
Death Leopard
Communist
FCCC-P
Corpore Metal
Frankenstein Destroyer
Free Enterprise
Mystic
Humanist
Pro Tech
Illuminati
Psion
PURGE
Romantic
Sierra Club

Error Messages

Unable to parse line:
R-Y: cafeteria

Clearly the Blender has been sabotaged by filthy commie mutant traitors! Please copy these error messages and email them to the High Programmer for investigation.

Your Mission

The Computer has generated the following mission for your team. It has been carefully designed to ensure the maximum safety and satisfaction for your team.

Paranoia is the Irrational Fear Someone is Out To Get You

(Fear) Dominant type of fear to install in the PCs: A hostile force is manipulating the PCs' conscious will.

(Irrational) General kind of weirdness or irregularity that prompts The Computer to assign a mission to the Troubleshooters: The economy has grown even stranger than usual.

(Someone) Person, people, organization or agency responsible for the situation: The Computer-or, if it makes more sense, a paranoid with sonic rifle (S3W energy) and kevlar armor (13) ULTRAVIOLET who is currently the youngest UV citizen in the Complex (probably late teens) manipulating The Computer's local CompNode. (The identity of the Someone need not be obvious at the mission's outset, and in fact things may play out more appropriately if the Someone is not discovered until late in the proceedings.)

(Out To Get You) General apparent threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: A high-clearance official's malfeasance will be exposed, and drugged (thymoglandin, hydropsionic acid) wishes to frame the Troubleshooters for the official's crime. The threat is a lie.

(Out To Get You) General real threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: The "Someone" believes (accurately?) the PCs are assassins sent to kill him; he tries to kill them first. Meanwhile, the PCs must complete their mission.

Mission Alert: Text message on PDC. Message is intact and correct.

Briefing: Briefing is in inside a character's mind (ORANGE Tech Services service technician (indifferent bystander, amicable, self-interested, ordinary)). 3 briefing officers undercover; wary, paranoid; speak in evasive code-phrases.

This Mission: INFRARED biohazard detection helper has a treasonous but powerful Slippery Skin (c), with which he has inspired revolt, and taken over empty dispatch in Troubleshooter HQ. Remove the mutant and resolve the unrest.

Outfitting: Infrared Market: Marketeer gives PCs a fair discount if they also take a "bonus" small vat of liquid nitrogen (freezes solid anything living upon contact); marketeer wants the PCs to [[Bad entry ]].

Debriefing: Room is sheet steel with a single chair in the center and a large sign: PLEASE SIT DOWN with arrow pointing to the chair. The debriefing officer spends the session pacing around the chair, and (if necessary) discourages PCs from sitting in it. Chair is lethal.

Find weird phrasing, clearly erroneous output, or other signs of filthy commie mutant traitor sabotage? Copy the offending passages and email them to the High Programmer for investigation.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online is based on the Mission Blender included with the Paranoia XP GM's Screen, published by Mongoose Publishing Ltd., and is provided here with the permission of the copyright owners. Copyright © 1983, 1987, 2004 by Eric Goldberg & Greg Costikyan. PARANOIA is a trademark of Eric Goldberg and Greg Costikyan. All rights reserved.

Paranoia XP is fun. Other games are not fun. Buy Paranoia.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online software was developed by Alan De Smet. Find bugs, weird language, or error messages? Want to chat about the Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online? Email me.