Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online

Team Leader Clearance:
Number of Service Services:
Secret Society Missions
Anti-Mutant
Computer Phreak
Death Leopard
Communist
FCCC-P
Corpore Metal
Frankenstein Destroyer
Free Enterprise
Mystic
Humanist
Pro Tech
Illuminati
Psion
PURGE
Romantic
Sierra Club

Your Mission

The Computer has generated the following mission for your team. It has been carefully designed to ensure the maximum safety and satisfaction for your team.

Paranoia is the Irrational Fear Someone is Out To Get You

(Fear) Dominant type of fear to install in the PCs: The PCs just aren't good enough to handle their assignment.

(Irrational) General kind of weirdness or irregularity that prompts The Computer to assign a mission to the Troubleshooters: The bureaucracy has provoked an intractable crisis.

(Someone) Person, people, organization or agency responsible for the situation: A fleet of warbots reprogrammed by Death Leopard. (The identity of the Someone need not be obvious at the mission's outset, and in fact things may play out more appropriately if the Someone is not discovered until late in the proceedings.)

(Out To Get You) General apparent threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: Surplus Armed Forces weaponry floods the IR market. Citizens (ORANGE HPD&MC Assistant Undersecretary (physical threat, drugged (thymoglandin, hydropsionic acid)); ORANGE HPD&MC vidshow animator (bureaucratic obstacle, wild eyed, incoherent, even frenzied); RED PLC order processing worker (bureaucratic obstacle, meticulous, obsessive-compulsive)) happily demonstrate their new armaments in many locations (BLUE (Tension 13) Proper Bedding Maintenance Hall of Fame; GREEN (Tension 11) empty dining area (IR: mess hall; R-Y: cafeteria; G-B: dining room; I-U: dining hall); GREEN (Tension 12) crowded decaying and pestilential wreck of an abandoned sector: living quarters (IR: barracks; R-Y: dormitory; G-B: apartment; I-U: mansion)). The threat is real.

Mission Alert: Stamped onto side of plutonium. Briefing time is wrong. The information is replaced by extortion threat from anonymous hacker: "Send 100cr to this Gray Subnet account and I'll send you the data."

Briefing: Briefing is in crowded Junior Citizen creche. Briefing officer is hiding inside an empty Cold Fun barrel and passes written notes out to the PCs through a small bunghole.

This Mission: Investigate mysterious disappearances of citizens in YELLOW (Tension 10) empty packing crate (or other small room). If they're being captured by Commies, save them. If they're trying to escape Alpha Complex, shoot them.

Outfitting: PLC: Office only carries "non-ordinance" items-no weapons or weapon-like items. Offers PCs a new "Zero-Tolerance" form to sign.

Debriefing: A pitch black room, with dim light filtering in under the entrance door. Unsettling clicking noises, like a trigger being pulled on a jammed gun.

Find weird phrasing, clearly erroneous output, or other signs of filthy commie mutant traitor sabotage? Copy the offending passages and email them to the High Programmer for investigation.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online is based on the Mission Blender included with the Paranoia XP GM's Screen, published by Mongoose Publishing Ltd., and is provided here with the permission of the copyright owners. Copyright © 1983, 1987, 2004 by Eric Goldberg & Greg Costikyan. PARANOIA is a trademark of Eric Goldberg and Greg Costikyan. All rights reserved.

Paranoia XP is fun. Other games are not fun. Buy Paranoia.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online software was developed by Alan De Smet. Find bugs, weird language, or error messages? Want to chat about the Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online? Email me.