Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online

Team Leader Clearance:
Number of Service Services:
Secret Society Missions
Computer Phreak
Death Leopard
Corpore Metal
Frankenstein Destroyer
Free Enterprise
Pro Tech
Sierra Club

Your Mission

The Computer has generated the following mission for your team. It has been carefully designed to ensure the maximum safety and satisfaction for your team.

Paranoia is the Irrational Fear Someone is Out To Get You

(Fear) Dominant type of fear to install in the PCs: The PCs' service firms or secret societies are endangered.

(Irrational) General kind of weirdness or irregularity that prompts The Computer to assign a mission to the Troubleshooters: Changed perceptions only certain characters (GREEN Power Services Repair Team leader (bureaucratic obstacle, dreamy, dazed, probably a Mystic)), including one or more PCs. The changed perception is hearing.

(Someone) Person, people, organization or agency responsible for the situation: A secret society mission that went right, led by drugged (thymoglandin, hydropsionic acid). (The identity of the Someone need not be obvious at the mission's outset, and in fact things may play out more appropriately if the Someone is not discovered until late in the proceedings.)

(Out To Get You) General apparent threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: Surplus Armed Forces weaponry floods the IR market. Citizens (INFRARED vendobot Hot Fun supplier (indifferent bystander, drugged (thymoglandin, hydropsionic acid)); YELLOW HPD&MC afternoon vidshow host (indifferent bystander, amicable, self-interested, ordinary); ORANGE IntSec Second Line Riot Control (bureaucratic obstacle, dreamy, dazed, probably a Mystic)) happily demonstrate their new armaments in many locations (INFRARED (Tension 2) empty R&D biochemical research laboratory; ORANGE (Tension 8) crowded Junior Citizen creche; VIOLET (Tension 17) Free Enterprise meeting room (holds only guards)). The threat is real.

Mission Alert: Via high-frequency radio transmission that gives PCs excruciating headaches and sends petbots crazy with excitement. Message is intact and correct.

Briefing: Briefing is in crowded Technical Services cloning facility (well guarded). 3 briefing officers behind opaque bulletproof glass, voices electronically filtered.

This Mission: Investigate mysterious disappearances of citizens in YELLOW (Tension 10) crowded dining area (IR: mess hall; R-Y: cafeteria; G-B: dining room; I-U: dining hall). If they're being captured by Commies, save them. If they're trying to escape Alpha Complex, shoot them.

Outfitting: C-Bay or other online auction site: Price: 30% off. Delivery: agreed drop point nearby (BLUE (Tension 14) empty corridor), immediate. Nothing at all unusual about this transaction. Or is there? Sounds a little suspicious, doesn't it? Absolutely nothing wrong? Really? Hmm....

Debriefing: A cavernous spherical reactor coolant chamber (recently decommisioned) with the PCs securely strapped into dentist chairs at wrist, ankle, waist and chin. The booming voice of the unseen officer echoes from strategically placed speakers.

Find weird phrasing, clearly erroneous output, or other signs of filthy commie mutant traitor sabotage? Copy the offending passages and email them to the High Programmer for investigation.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online is based on the Mission Blender included with the Paranoia XP GM's Screen, published by Mongoose Publishing Ltd., and is provided here with the permission of the copyright owners. Copyright © 1983, 1987, 2004 by Eric Goldberg & Greg Costikyan. PARANOIA is a trademark of Eric Goldberg and Greg Costikyan. All rights reserved.

Paranoia XP is fun. Other games are not fun. Buy Paranoia.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online software was developed by Alan De Smet. Find bugs, weird language, or error messages? Want to chat about the Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online? Email me.