Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online

Team Leader Clearance:
Number of Service Services:
Secret Society Missions
Anti-Mutant
Computer Phreak
Death Leopard
Communist
FCCC-P
Corpore Metal
Frankenstein Destroyer
Free Enterprise
Mystic
Humanist
Pro Tech
Illuminati
Psion
PURGE
Romantic
Sierra Club

Your Mission

The Computer has generated the following mission for your team. It has been carefully designed to ensure the maximum safety and satisfaction for your team.

Paranoia is the Irrational Fear Someone is Out To Get You

(Fear) Dominant type of fear to install in the PCs: The Commie mutant traitors are losing, and that's bad.

(Irrational) General kind of weirdness or irregularity that prompts The Computer to assign a mission to the Troubleshooters: One kind of technological object (toothbrush) is misbehaving.

(Someone) Person, people, organization or agency responsible for the situation: A senior CPU efficiency consultant, who overreacted in imprudent ways in an effort to get proper paperwork filled out. (The identity of the Someone need not be obvious at the mission's outset, and in fact things may play out more appropriately if the Someone is not discovered until late in the proceedings.)

(Out To Get You) General apparent threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: Roll three times on this chart. Everything you roll is happening at once, and the PCs are caught in the chaos. Good luck running this one. The threat is real.

Mission Alert: Announced over public address loudspeakers. Briefing time is wrong. The information is obscured by advertising (pop-up ad, jingle, viral marketing, etc.). Sponsoring advertiser may possibly have record of unaltered alert.

Briefing: Briefing is in heat-resistant mitten knitting sweatshop. Given in a transtube, on a recording with a folder of documents; recording self-destructs 5 seconds after stopping. wrong mission, right tape, right does

This Mission: Deliver this Snooper (small hovering sphere that tracks a target's scent) (or bot brain) to ULTRAVIOLET who is currently the youngest UV citizen in the Complex (probably late teens). Though the item appears treasonous, rest assured it is perfectly above-board. Perfectly.

Outfitting: PLC: Surprisingly efficient, but all items have had inventory barcodes removed. Staffers refuse to take returned equipment: "It wasn't issued here."

Debriefing: Debriefing room is well appointed with luxurious carpet, comfortable chairs and refreshments served throughout. Soothing musics plays throughout the session. Laser emplacements are visible in every corner and track the PCs' every move.

Find weird phrasing, clearly erroneous output, or other signs of filthy commie mutant traitor sabotage? Copy the offending passages and email them to the High Programmer for investigation.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online is based on the Mission Blender included with the Paranoia XP GM's Screen, published by Mongoose Publishing Ltd., and is provided here with the permission of the copyright owners. Copyright © 1983, 1987, 2004 by Eric Goldberg & Greg Costikyan. PARANOIA is a trademark of Eric Goldberg and Greg Costikyan. All rights reserved.

Paranoia XP is fun. Other games are not fun. Buy Paranoia.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online software was developed by Alan De Smet. Find bugs, weird language, or error messages? Want to chat about the Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online? Email me.