Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online

Team Leader Clearance:
Number of Service Services:
Secret Society Missions
Computer Phreak
Death Leopard
Corpore Metal
Frankenstein Destroyer
Free Enterprise
Pro Tech
Sierra Club

Your Mission

The Computer has generated the following mission for your team. It has been carefully designed to ensure the maximum safety and satisfaction for your team.

Paranoia is the Irrational Fear Someone is Out To Get You

(Fear) Dominant type of fear to install in the PCs: The PCs' secret societies have turned against them.

(Irrational) General kind of weirdness or irregularity that prompts The Computer to assign a mission to the Troubleshooters: One or more laws of nature has been altered or revoked. It's light or sound.

(Someone) Person, people, organization or agency responsible for the situation: A subsector's Infrareds, who have gone off their pharmatherapy and are now conspiring against The Computer, led by ORANGE Armed Forces corporal (bureaucratic obstacle, buzzing, high on Wakey-Wakey). (The identity of the Someone need not be obvious at the mission's outset, and in fact things may play out more appropriately if the Someone is not discovered until late in the proceedings.)

(Out To Get You) General apparent threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: Surplus Armed Forces weaponry floods the IR market. Citizens (INFRARED retirement gulag laundry worker (information source, psychotic, kill-crush-smash-destroy); ULTRAVIOLET with the blood of many citizens on his person (physical threat, wild eyed, incoherent, even frenzied); YELLOW sector chemical hazard assayer (bureaucratic obstacle, paranoid with sonic rifle (S3W energy) and jet suit (Experimental R&D equipment, aerodynamic suit with jetpack))) happily demonstrate their new armaments in many locations (GREEN (Tension 12) empty bathroom (change Tension level to 20); GREEN (Tension 11) crowded recreational resort (if below Clearance GREEN, roll again); ORANGE (Tension 7) crowded grooming and hygiene station). The threat is a lie.

(Out To Get You) General real threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: A deadly pathogen is eating through the population. The PCs are infected the moment their clone backups are decanted. Better hurry on the mission!

Mission Alert: Text message on PDC. Message is intact and correct.

Briefing: Briefing is in empty living quarters (IR: barracks; R-Y: dormitory; G-B: apartment; I-U: mansion). Given in a transtube, on a recording with a folder of documents; recording self-destructs 5 seconds after stopping. wrong mission, right tape, right does

This Mission: Evacuate technicians from the reactor at YELLOW (Tension 9) IR marketeer living quarters. Of course the radiation levels are safe-but hurry.

Outfitting: C-Bay or other online auction site: Price: list price. Delivery: please allow 24 hours for delivery to PCs' specified address. Nothing at all unusual about this transaction. Or is there? Sounds a little suspicious, doesn't it? Absolutely nothing wrong? Really? Hmm....

Debriefing: The debriefing officer sits in complete silence while paging through several thick files, flanked by BLUE Vulture troopers armed with cone rifles. PCs who speak are met with scowls. The debriefing ends without a word.

Find weird phrasing, clearly erroneous output, or other signs of filthy commie mutant traitor sabotage? Copy the offending passages and email them to the High Programmer for investigation.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online is based on the Mission Blender included with the Paranoia XP GM's Screen, published by Mongoose Publishing Ltd., and is provided here with the permission of the copyright owners. Copyright © 1983, 1987, 2004 by Eric Goldberg & Greg Costikyan. PARANOIA is a trademark of Eric Goldberg and Greg Costikyan. All rights reserved.

Paranoia XP is fun. Other games are not fun. Buy Paranoia.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online software was developed by Alan De Smet. Find bugs, weird language, or error messages? Want to chat about the Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online? Email me.