Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online

Team Leader Clearance:
Number of Service Services:
Secret Society Missions
Anti-Mutant
Computer Phreak
Death Leopard
Communist
FCCC-P
Corpore Metal
Frankenstein Destroyer
Free Enterprise
Mystic
Humanist
Pro Tech
Illuminati
Psion
PURGE
Romantic
Sierra Club

Your Mission

The Computer has generated the following mission for your team. It has been carefully designed to ensure the maximum safety and satisfaction for your team.

Paranoia is the Irrational Fear Someone is Out To Get You

(Fear) Dominant type of fear to install in the PCs: Alpha Complex works with terrifying efficiency.

(Irrational) General kind of weirdness or irregularity that prompts The Computer to assign a mission to the Troubleshooters: Everyone in Alpha Complex behaves in an inexplicably kind way toward all PCs.

(Someone) Person, people, organization or agency responsible for the situation: An R&D experiment that went right, created by paranoid with energy pistol (W3K energy) and battle armor (6). (The identity of the Someone need not be obvious at the mission's outset, and in fact things may play out more appropriately if the Someone is not discovered until late in the proceedings.)

(Out To Get You) General apparent threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: Surplus Armed Forces weaponry floods the IR market. Citizens (INFRARED mess hall grease trap cleaner (indifferent bystander, wild eyed, incoherent, even frenzied); INFRARED scrubot lint screen cleaner (physical threat, buzzing, high on Wakey-Wakey); ORANGE Handler (bot specialist) (indifferent bystander, psychotic, kill-crush-smash-destroy)) happily demonstrate their new armaments in many locations (INFRARED (Tension 3) Museum of Famous Forms; RED (Tension 6) inside Alpha Complex dome ; RED (Tension 6) crowded soylent recycling room (near morgue)). The threat is a lie.

(Out To Get You) General real threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: Waste disposal is breaking down; garbage is backing up in the hallways and will soon flood the complex.

Mission Alert: Via high-frequency radio transmission that gives PCs excruciating headaches and sends petbots crazy with excitement. Message is intact and correct.

Briefing: Briefing is in crowded elevator (or other small room). Briefing officer has left a recording device with the mission on it, but the mechanism is jammed at double speed with no rewind option.

This Mission: Neutralize RED IntSec riot control stooge (indifferent bystander, drugged (sandallathon, visomorpain)) in empty garage / vehicle dispatch.

Outfitting: C-Bay or other online auction site: Price: 50% discount off list price. Delivery: drop point 30 minutes away (INDIGO (Tension 15) empty Vulture Squadron hangar). A PC's auction site account has been hijacked by a Computer Phreak using it to auction treasonous warbot plans.

Debriefing: The debriefing room is locked when the PCs arrive, and no debriefing officer ever arrives no matter how long they wait.

Find weird phrasing, clearly erroneous output, or other signs of filthy commie mutant traitor sabotage? Copy the offending passages and email them to the High Programmer for investigation.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online is based on the Mission Blender included with the Paranoia XP GM's Screen, published by Mongoose Publishing Ltd., and is provided here with the permission of the copyright owners. Copyright © 1983, 1987, 2004 by Eric Goldberg & Greg Costikyan. PARANOIA is a trademark of Eric Goldberg and Greg Costikyan. All rights reserved.

Paranoia XP is fun. Other games are not fun. Buy Paranoia.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online software was developed by Alan De Smet. Find bugs, weird language, or error messages? Want to chat about the Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online? Email me.