Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online

Team Leader Clearance:
Number of Service Services:
Secret Society Missions
Anti-Mutant
Computer Phreak
Death Leopard
Communist
FCCC-P
Corpore Metal
Frankenstein Destroyer
Free Enterprise
Mystic
Humanist
Pro Tech
Illuminati
Psion
PURGE
Romantic
Sierra Club

Your Mission

The Computer has generated the following mission for your team. It has been carefully designed to ensure the maximum safety and satisfaction for your team.

Paranoia is the Irrational Fear Someone is Out To Get You

(Fear) Dominant type of fear to install in the PCs: The effect the PCs are ordered to prevent will be caused by their actions.

(Irrational) General kind of weirdness or irregularity that prompts The Computer to assign a mission to the Troubleshooters: The economy has grown even stranger than usual.

(Someone) Person, people, organization or agency responsible for the situation: An executive at one of the PCs' service firms, who wishes to covertly create the situation in order to procure a fat service-group repair contract. (The identity of the Someone need not be obvious at the mission's outset, and in fact things may play out more appropriately if the Someone is not discovered until late in the proceedings.)

(Out To Get You) General apparent threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: The "Someone" believes (accurately?) the PCs are assassins sent to kill him; he tries to kill them first. Meanwhile, the PCs must complete their mission. The threat is a lie.

(Out To Get You) General real threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: A geological event will destroy Alpha Complex (shatter it, open it to the elements, turn it into a cheerily warm volcano, etc.).

Mission Alert: Announced over public address loudspeakers. Recognition password (to be given to briefing officer) is wrong. The information is obscured by advertising (pop-up ad, jingle, viral marketing, etc.). Sponsoring advertiser may possibly have record of unaltered alert.

Briefing: Briefing is in crowded soylent recycling room (near morgue). Briefing officer whispers the briefing to the team leader and then expects him to pass it on in the style of Telephone or Chinese Whispers.

This Mission: A Vulture Squadron has been infiltrated by no less than 16 Commie traitors. Remove them; ensure they fall in the line of duty, so we can honor them as fallen heroes.

Outfitting: Infrared Market: This market is run by the secret society of one PC (select randomly), who always gets the best deals and everything that works.

Debriefing: Room is sheet steel with a single chair in the center and a large sign: PLEASE SIT DOWN with arrow pointing to the chair. The debriefing officer spends the session pacing around the chair, and (if necessary) discourages PCs from sitting in it. Chair is lethal.

Find weird phrasing, clearly erroneous output, or other signs of filthy commie mutant traitor sabotage? Copy the offending passages and email them to the High Programmer for investigation.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online is based on the Mission Blender included with the Paranoia XP GM's Screen, published by Mongoose Publishing Ltd., and is provided here with the permission of the copyright owners. Copyright © 1983, 1987, 2004 by Eric Goldberg & Greg Costikyan. PARANOIA is a trademark of Eric Goldberg and Greg Costikyan. All rights reserved.

Paranoia XP is fun. Other games are not fun. Buy Paranoia.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online software was developed by Alan De Smet. Find bugs, weird language, or error messages? Want to chat about the Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online? Email me.