Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online

Team Leader Clearance:
Number of Service Services:
Secret Society Missions
Computer Phreak
Death Leopard
Corpore Metal
Frankenstein Destroyer
Free Enterprise
Pro Tech
Sierra Club

Your Mission

The Computer has generated the following mission for your team. It has been carefully designed to ensure the maximum safety and satisfaction for your team.

Paranoia is the Irrational Fear Someone is Out To Get You

(Fear) Dominant type of fear to install in the PCs: The PCs' secret societies have turned against them.

(Irrational) General kind of weirdness or irregularity that prompts The Computer to assign a mission to the Troubleshooters: The security clearance system has provoked an intractable crisis.

(Someone) Person, people, organization or agency responsible for the situation: A secret society mission that went disastrously wrong, led by paranoid with laser pistol (W3K energy) with BLUE barrel and kevlar armor (13). (The identity of the Someone need not be obvious at the mission's outset, and in fact things may play out more appropriately if the Someone is not discovered until late in the proceedings.)

(Out To Get You) General apparent threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: A minor malfunction in YELLOW (Tension 10) crowded living quarters (IR: barracks; R-Y: dormitory; G-B: apartment; I-U: mansion) may grow into a major problem. The PCs must fix the malfunction and deal with the problems already created. The threat is a lie.

(Out To Get You) General real threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: Roll three times on this chart. Everything you roll is happening at once, and the PCs are caught in the chaos. Good luck running this one.

Mission Alert: Text message on PDC. Briefing location is wrong. The information is replaced by extortion threat from anonymous hacker: "Send 100cr to this Gray Subnet account and I'll send you the data."

Briefing: Briefing is in empty Armed Forces armory. Briefing officer is shot just after the PCs arrive and is replaced by a different officer who acts extremely shifty and refuses to answer questions.

This Mission: Transfer the highly dangerous traitor RED CPU forms courier (information source, paranoid with hand flamer (S3K energy) and electromagnetic clothing (Experimental R&D equipment, makes wearer a living magnet; can stick to metal walls, watch out for knives!)) to a more secure YELLOW (Tension 9) crowded transtube station. Make sure he doesn't die; we want to save that for the Date with Death vidshow.

Outfitting: PLC: A Multi-Purpose Chute with graffiti "CompUSUKS!" above it-a password (Comp-U-SUK-5) into an unlimited account on this compromised machine.

Debriefing: The debriefing officer stands behind a massive, blast-shielded podium flanked by blue Vulture troopers with plasma generators, while the PCs sit in brilliant interrogation spotlights that look disconcertingly like bullseyes.

Find weird phrasing, clearly erroneous output, or other signs of filthy commie mutant traitor sabotage? Copy the offending passages and email them to the High Programmer for investigation.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online is based on the Mission Blender included with the Paranoia XP GM's Screen, published by Mongoose Publishing Ltd., and is provided here with the permission of the copyright owners. Copyright © 1983, 1987, 2004 by Eric Goldberg & Greg Costikyan. PARANOIA is a trademark of Eric Goldberg and Greg Costikyan. All rights reserved.

Paranoia XP is fun. Other games are not fun. Buy Paranoia.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online software was developed by Alan De Smet. Find bugs, weird language, or error messages? Want to chat about the Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online? Email me.