Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online

Team Leader Clearance:
Number of Service Services:
Secret Society Missions
Computer Phreak
Death Leopard
Corpore Metal
Frankenstein Destroyer
Free Enterprise
Pro Tech
Sierra Club

Your Mission

The Computer has generated the following mission for your team. It has been carefully designed to ensure the maximum safety and satisfaction for your team.

Paranoia is the Irrational Fear Someone is Out To Get You

(Fear) Dominant type of fear to install in the PCs: Two or more service groups are breaking each other down.

(Irrational) General kind of weirdness or irregularity that prompts The Computer to assign a mission to the Troubleshooters: The bureaucracy has provoked an intractable crisis.

(Someone) Person, people, organization or agency responsible for the situation: A senior PLC official, whose division has fallen into strangling bureaucratic torpor and must now be massively overhauled or terminated. (The identity of the Someone need not be obvious at the mission's outset, and in fact things may play out more appropriately if the Someone is not discovered until late in the proceedings.)

(Out To Get You) General apparent threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: An exterior force will conquer Alpha Complex. The Computer dispatches the Troubleshooters to intercept the force. The threat is real.

Mission Alert: Text message on PDC. Message is intact and correct.

Briefing: Briefing is in Corpore Metal meeting room (holds only guards). 1 suspicious, twitchy briefing officer(s) in highly defended position (e.g., seated atop a massive gun emplacement) at rear of INDIGO (Tension 15) CompNode SubNode.

This Mission: Guard INDIGO C-Bay auction site chief executive on his latest pleasure trip. Pay no attention to his odd comments.

Outfitting: C-Bay or other online auction site: Price: 10% off. Delivery: drop point 30 minutes away (ORANGE (Tension 7) Junior Citizen fort (no Commies allowed!)). Drop point to pick up purchased equipment is Museum of Famous Forms run by Frankenstein Destroyers, which charges a 2% commission for services.

Debriefing: Troubleshooters and debriefing officer sit at a round table. Officer orders them to play a card or board game, while the officer encourages them to reveal details about their mission and about their feelings.

Find weird phrasing, clearly erroneous output, or other signs of filthy commie mutant traitor sabotage? Copy the offending passages and email them to the High Programmer for investigation.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online is based on the Mission Blender included with the Paranoia XP GM's Screen, published by Mongoose Publishing Ltd., and is provided here with the permission of the copyright owners. Copyright © 1983, 1987, 2004 by Eric Goldberg & Greg Costikyan. PARANOIA is a trademark of Eric Goldberg and Greg Costikyan. All rights reserved.

Paranoia XP is fun. Other games are not fun. Buy Paranoia.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online software was developed by Alan De Smet. Find bugs, weird language, or error messages? Want to chat about the Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online? Email me.