Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online

Team Leader Clearance:
Number of Service Services:
Secret Society Missions
Anti-Mutant
Computer Phreak
Death Leopard
Communist
FCCC-P
Corpore Metal
Frankenstein Destroyer
Free Enterprise
Mystic
Humanist
Pro Tech
Illuminati
Psion
PURGE
Romantic
Sierra Club

Your Mission

The Computer has generated the following mission for your team. It has been carefully designed to ensure the maximum safety and satisfaction for your team.

Paranoia is the Irrational Fear Someone is Out To Get You

(Fear) Dominant type of fear to install in the PCs: Alpha Complex is just a simulation; nothing is physically real.

(Irrational) General kind of weirdness or irregularity that prompts The Computer to assign a mission to the Troubleshooters: The Computer has decreed a new holiday with odd customs and practices, and everyone knows about it but the PCs.

(Someone) Person, people, organization or agency responsible for the situation: An executive at one of the PCs' service firms, who wishes to covertly create the situation in order to procure a fat service-group repair contract. (The identity of the Someone need not be obvious at the mission's outset, and in fact things may play out more appropriately if the Someone is not discovered until late in the proceedings.)

(Out To Get You) General apparent threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: The Computer believes something horrible has happened, but gives the PCs no details, and forbids them to tell anyone for fear of starting a panic. The threat is real.

Mission Alert: Scrawled across a RED (Tension 6) abandoned Vulture Squadron battle readiness exercise field wall in half-meter-high letters written in black paint. Briefing time is wrong. The information is missing, replaced by [INSERT DATA HERE] or similar. Secret society contacts or servile truckling to The Computer may fill in missing data.

Briefing: Briefing is in natural cavern. Briefing officer is hidden inside a Snooper (small hovering sphere that tracks a target's scent) chassis, communicating with an electronically filtered voice.

This Mission: An unauthorized weaponized anthrax or bioweapon was accidentally deployed at private slime farm. Go and retrieve it before it squashes something important.

Outfitting: PLC: Office; looks very busy, but nothing ever gets done. Careful inspection shows all workers are passing the same papers back and forth quickly.

Debriefing: Debriefing takes place in a cinema with stadium seating, popcorn and Bouncy Bubble Beverage, with security camera and bot recordings of each PC's less commendable activities projected onscreen.

Find weird phrasing, clearly erroneous output, or other signs of filthy commie mutant traitor sabotage? Copy the offending passages and email them to the High Programmer for investigation.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online is based on the Mission Blender included with the Paranoia XP GM's Screen, published by Mongoose Publishing Ltd., and is provided here with the permission of the copyright owners. Copyright © 1983, 1987, 2004 by Eric Goldberg & Greg Costikyan. PARANOIA is a trademark of Eric Goldberg and Greg Costikyan. All rights reserved.

Paranoia XP is fun. Other games are not fun. Buy Paranoia.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online software was developed by Alan De Smet. Find bugs, weird language, or error messages? Want to chat about the Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online? Email me.