High Programmer > Alan De Smet > Unique ID > Emailing Me

Emailing Me

Can you help me track someone down?

I regret that I cannot help you. I'm not a private detective, I don't have access to various state license databases. I'm just a number encoding enthusiast. As far as I know no state encodes information like place of employment or home address in their number. I simply have no information or skills that can help you.

Can you make me a fake ID?

You're planning on asking a stranger on the internet to help you commit fraud. That action is almost certainly across state lines, putting into the jurisdiction of the FBI. To receive your fake ID, you'd need to provide a photograph of yourself and a mailing address that the FBI could stake out. I might be an FBI agent and this entire site could be an elaborate sting operation. The NSA is collecting most of the email sent over the internet, is capable of searching it easily, and shares that information with the FBI.

No, really, can you make me a fake ID?

No. I don't make fake IDs.

I have never made fake IDs.

I have far better things to do than risking prison so 18-year-olds can go to bars.

Frankly, I'm disappointed that your best strategy to get drunk is to ask strangers on the internet for help.

I have some other question

Sorry for all of the bother; I get a depressing amount of email about the above, and it's getting to be a nuisance. My email address puts the word "webemail" in front of the @ sign, and "highprogrammer.com" after it. Sorry for the nuisance; I get a lot of spam and this slightly helps stem the tide.

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